30 Days of Do

The Linenlady's Vintage Linens and Buttons

2009-10-08T07:45:00.001-04:00

Gorgeous Laces, Linens, Hankies and remnants of bygone eras. Buttons of nearly every variety. Embellishments for your textile art.

in reference to: Home (The Linenlady) (view on Google Sidewiki)

Robin's Sidewiki

2009-09-28T21:57:00.001-04:00

I rock!

in reference to: Facebook | Robin Haigh Morgan (view on Google Sidewiki)

2008-11-21T07:33:00.004-05:00

Hello again. Checking in before the working weekend begins. Still doing the same job at the same place but now I'm working as supervisor until they find a permanent one. This is nowhere NEAR a glamorous job, especially since I try to attract as little attention as possible. But, I do have a really nice crew that I'm working with right now and it makes it a lot easier. I have a Spiritualist Nursing assistant who swears that her spirit tells her when patients are in trouble. I wish she had a really useful spirit that would tell me what the Megabucks numbers were going to be or that would keep the patients in their beds and not asking for anything when the new season of 24 starts on Sunday. Can I get an AMEN? And here we have the reason that I didn't update for so long...I was on a writer's strike also! I still haven't received any benefits, but I get paid about 50% more than I was getting paid. (Pause for multiplying times zero)

I almost considered making a political post at the beginning of the month, but (probably wisely) held my tongue. Let's just say I am very happy about the outcome, but I still haven't figured out what I'm going to wear to the Inaugural Ball. What DOES a coatcheck girl wear??

I hope everyone is doing well and staying ahead of the game for the holidays!

More Reasons to Screw Around all Day

2008-11-12T12:44:00.001-05:00

Back?

2008-11-11T18:44:00.008-05:00

I keep saying that I'll start posting again and never do. So, I'm just going to go ahead and do it. My old template was SO old that I decided just to scrap it for now and then I'll edit it later.

Both kids are in high school now and that is good and bad. Good, they're independent and don't need a babysitter...Bad, they have a million and one activities and places to be and can't drive yet. So, taxi service is open! Fortunately, they are both enjoying high school and I don't have too many dramas except that my son (my BABY) has had two girlfriends already this year and is now chatting up a third. YIKE.

The animals are just as crazy as ever. The dogs are mellowing out a bit. We tried them on a raw diet over the summer and that worked out okay except that it was costing 150-200+ a month. So, we put them back on Kibble (yeah, we suck) But! It's really good Kibble. I'll put a plug in for it because it is really the best. No grain, no junk, 75% less Melamine than other leading brands(LOL): Innova EVO The stuff is pretty expensive, but not 200 bucks a month expensive. The dogs tolerate it, but with quite pointed stares at me when I'm cutting up raw chicken for dinner.

Yoda the Wondercat™ is a big clown who keeps all of the other animals on their feet. He loves to run into the room and get the dogs fired up, then race off to another part of the house with them on his heels.

We did have some sadness: Fluffy, my old guy passed away earlier this year. He was the best friend anyone could have ever had and he had a very long, happy and spoiled life.

RIP my buddy, there's plenty more of that where you're at!

It's 30 Days of Do, Bitch!

2007-10-04T10:22:00.002-04:00

I guess it's time to stop pretending that I'm going to try to come back regularly or even semi-regularly, so I'm thinking each season for right now...it's still fall, right? Anyway, sorry to keep you all in suspense, but after my disastrous performance at the VMAs, I've really had a lot on my plate. (like stalking Rihanna, that skinny bitch)

So...what is there to talk about? I've been stuck at home for nearly 2 weeks with the dogs because Luca had kennel cough

If you've never heard a dog make a sound like it was hawking up a chainsaw, you've really missed out on something! Poor Luca...he really wasn't as bothered by the whole thing as Kai was. She wanted to go to daycare! Every day until around 1 in the afternoon, she would growl and fuss and stand in front of the front door. She'd start doing jumping jacks every time I made a motion that LOOKED like it was heading toward the door. This experience had me fondly recalling the days of trying to have 30 seconds to myself in the bathroom while toddlers pounded on the door or wandered into traffic. My poor cats, for which 'Dogs at Daycare'='Vacation' were not especially pleased, either.

I actually started a garden IN THE GROUND, if you can believe it. Here there be evidence. Now you know it WOULD have looked better and more convincing had there been actual FLOWERS in the garden, but I have just dug up my gladiolas and put in iris and daffodil bulbs, so you're going to have to use your imagination a little bit. Turn on Dora and grab your magic backpack if it helps. These are some lilies and irises that mom gave me to plant and they're doing pretty well. Behind that is my peony. This one is a deep fuschia, but I have ordered a pale pink (can't recall if it is blush or bashful haha) and a coral colored one. This garden was just the small corner I dug by the peony and I kept expanding it out a little bit at a time. Eventually, I hope to join it to a walkway to the lower yard.

There are also a lot of iris, hyacinth and daffodil bulbs here. I did have acidanthera sort of unenthusiastically blooming, but dug them up along with the glads.

Here are some of the results of my planting marigold seeds last spring. This is actually pretty cool. I must have exposed some of them to radiation or nuclear waste or dog pee because check out the size of this marigold... Ayi!!!! GOING SWARROW TOKYO!!!

Finally, here is a picture of a piece of slate that my youngest found and brought home for the border.

What else...I went to a great class, Advanced Layers, taught by Jane Dunnewold.
I learned how to do silk screen printing, soy wax batik, glue/gel medium resists, flour paste resists and very cool 'faux silk screens' made from interfacing, tulle and house paint and a whole ton of other fun stuff. I came home with dye all over my clothes and probably absorbed into every pore in my body. Since I just messed up my card reader, I'm going to save the pictures of some of my projects for another post.

So...what did YOU all do on summer vacation?

Summer Sprawl

2007-06-29T10:08:00.000-04:00

Hello everyone! I am writing to you from Writely, which is google's document writer. I tried using windows live writer and I can't seem to get the proper posting url to work. I noticed other people having the same problem, but I don't see the workaround answer...anyone know?

And WHY, you are probably asking, am I even BOTHERING to find publishing software for a blog that I have so SORELY neglected? You should know the answer to that already. Stupidity (AKA Comedy) happens, and I am either there to perform, experience or witness it and I feel a responsibility to record it. This is not to say that my life has been "Stupidity free" since I last posted...nay nay! I can just never remember the stupidity by the time I get to the computer.

So, lets see...the summer so far, in review. Wake up, hide in the media room reading my email until Evil (the children) awakes. Spend day ferrying, fielding phone calls or scheduling intricate meeting arrangements for said Evil. I do get breaks, because Cuteness (the animals) needs to be fed, petted or walked. To add to this symbiosis, I have (sort of) taken up gardening, as evidenced by my dinner plate sized dahlia picture in the post below. Right now, I am working with containers, which I can keep close to the house so that I don't forget all about them. Sort of a KinderGARDEN, if you will. I haven't killed anything, except for poor "Jack Flower" (the card read, "take care of Jack Flower...he's got a gun!") which is a very hapless impatiens that my kids got me for mother's day 2 years ago. It thrived in a tiny pot until it got too big this spring, so I replanted it in some very nice miracle gro soil in a big hanging planter right in the middle of a sunny window. For all of my care and attention, it turned all powdery and the stems rotted and fell off. "Army of One" ? I don't think so.

Look what Robin Hath Wrought!

2007-05-23T07:50:00.000-04:00

AKA "Look what Robin didn't kill quick enough before it bloomed!"

30 Days of Do: Now with 75% LESS Giving a Shit!

2007-05-21T18:20:00.000-04:00

Now you all know what I am up against every day of my life...

Rhetorical Pleasantry Elicits 45-Minute Response

KANSAS CITY, MO-"When he put his hand on my shoulder, I knew it would be a while," recalled Harding, who could not escape from the monologue.

Alterated? Or Ruinated?

2007-04-15T17:41:00.000-04:00

Dude, I'm OBSESSED with purses. Not in HAVING them, but making them. I don't know what it is about them. I love looking at them, coming up with new designs or ideas or well, just plain ruining the shit out of them. Behold! A perfectly nice tote that came from Mom-in-Law with my monogram on it. I decided to add a few things to the back. It is colored with Neocolor II pastels and is collaged with fabric printouts, lace, some funky glue-y bead stew (you spread the beads on and they stick) puff paints, rick-rack and magazine clips. It is kind of chaotic, but I have always loved the "encrusted" look of some collages and wanted to go for that effect. Mine are usually too deliberate and wind up with one little thing here...and another little thing over here, etc. I got the idea from "Haute Handbags" which had a NICE example, rather than my abomination. When I got the book, I also got some really cool "Dick and Jane" fabric and made a mini purse for my daughter from a pair of my son's camo pants. It doesn't have a strap yet, because I used up so much of the pants to tweak the pattern that there wasn't enough left, but I'm working on it.

HAHA! It says DICK!

With my Usual Punctuality...

2006-12-27T13:35:00.000-05:00

Look at the Sign Above our Heads

2006-12-07T11:57:00.000-05:00

March 1997

EH?

2006-09-20T11:24:00.000-04:00

Sellout Much?

Maybe you all don't know, but I am a diehard U2 fan, going straight back to about the 'Boy' album. I've seen them in concert many times, but stopped in the late 90s when it was apparent I would have to sell one of my children to be able to afford a ticket. I just saw a little "spontaneous" (note the quotes emphasized there?) video that Bono made of The Edge for Yahoo. 20 years ago, I probably would have passed out in excitement, but now, as jaded as I am, I can only wonder...am I the ONLY person who notices that Bono no longer has an Irish accent??!?

Seriously...Seriously?

2006-09-11T18:49:00.000-04:00

Latest search term from someone obviously DESPERATE for me to post...

"

ive been verbally abused what do i do

First...Bitches? Don't make me go Haiku on your asses. I'll 5-7-5 you till you love me!

Second? Maybe searching for comfort on the internet is NOT a good idea; I'm just sayin...

Case in Point

2006-09-06T13:15:00.000-04:00

2006-09-06T09:53:00.000-04:00

A Day at my House

This is a phrase used LIBERALLY at my house. Usually about Luca. We have taken to calling him Brick, because when Kai barks, he starts barking and running around and you can see he's all like "I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I AM BARKING!!

Bloggable Offense #1

2006-08-31T15:13:00.000-04:00

So, I've told you all about getting Sirius radio for my Honey, so that he could listen to Howard Stern on his way to work. THEN, I got him a motorcycle so that *I* could take his car all the time and listen to Howard Stern; which is what I did today. I was on my way to the Post Office downtown and there was all kinds of construction and all the cars were crawling along or stopped. I was waiting for the light to turn and listening to Stern with the windows down. This old guy was being helped out of a pub on a side street and started hobbling along the sidewalk with his cane (Mind you, this was 10:45 in the morning...)Just as he neared my car, Stern plays a Crazy Alice clip and this old guy got to hear "ARRIVEDERCI C*CK SUCKAH!!!" BLASTING from my car. He just peered into my car...bet he wasn't expecting to see Hannah Housewife sitting there smiling and looking sheepish. Why the hell can I NEVER see these things coming? I get in the car with my kids, and it isn't until some story about "anal" comes on that I realize uh...better switch the channel, dumbass!

Mist Yew

2006-08-24T12:20:00.000-04:00

I've been having a great summer, this year. I am glad that I managed to get outside for a change...I'm even sporting a skin color that is slightly darker than "anaerobic grub" white! I've just finished the first phase of the "back to school" purchasing; the sport tryouts gear phase. As always, I am skating the last minute...tryouts started today. Next is the actual "buying of the school clothes" phase. Wish these damned kids wore uniforms!

Unbelievably, I was able to finish all of those small altered cards for the all-for-one project, and um...Bitches? They aren't due until NEXT WEEK. Now, of course, I will dawdle on mailing them until November. So, in clockwise order, I'll 'splain them. Top Left is rubber stamped and fabric collaged. The diver is collaged, covered with extra heavy gel medium and textures carved in (which you can't see on the scan) The camels are collaged and highlighted with copper stamp ink. The squiggle is a Zentangle done with Prang metallic and Marvy markers and Crayola spider writers. The TV card is collaged, and the checkerboard card has strips of marbled cards woven into it...then I gelled the shit out of it to make it stay. We'll see. All of these cards are part of different paintings that were cut into small cards to be altered by a bunch of different people. Now the paintings will be reassembled and exhibited.

No post is complete without a cute animal picture...lets see.

Aren't we cute? For new people joining me, Kai is on the left and Luca is on the right. He always looks sorta pitiful when he sleeps...a very sad expression on his face. Behold:

Wah! I'm Luca...mommy is making me take a nap! WAH!

2006-08-22T13:09:00.000-04:00

Tis a Silly Place!

I know, I know...way too many videos, not enough posteos. I'll be back :)

It's True! Her Hips don't lie!

2006-08-20T15:53:00.000-04:00


I really actually LIKE Shakira, honest!

2006-08-15T18:02:00.000-04:00

The Tingling Means that it's Working!

When Poop Freezes Over

2006-08-14T17:54:00.000-04:00

Can you believe this actually exists???

Poop-Freeze

Happy 15th!

2006-08-11T12:43:00.000-04:00

This is the cake we had for my daughter's birthday. A little early, because it was made by one of my husband's co-workers who only had time to make it this week. Everything is made from scratch (Including the lilies!) The cake itself is chocolate with cream cheese frosting and a strawberry filling. Really rich...we were all able to stick to teensy slivers without a problem!

Today, the weather is just amazing...cool and dry, perfect! I've already taken the dogs out for roughly 2 hours worth of walks, and they are just being wacky today. For creative pursuits, I am working on a large project called the All for One project. An artist cut some acrylic paintings up into ATC sized pieces and sent 6 different pieces at a time to several people. We will all work on altering them, then send them back, where she will put them back in the original order. A lot of fun, but as I am sure you can well imagine...I am LATE AGAIN! I am nothing, if not consistent!

Look! Free Caulk!

2006-08-11T07:55:00.000-04:00

hehe

IT'S RAINING MEN

Make Like a Tree and BARK! No..That's not it...

2006-08-10T23:09:00.000-04:00

Okay, this was my idea to deal with my splotch problem. I used my neocolor IIs on the design and colored it in, and put the skeleton leaves over it. The leaves are not COVERING it, mind you. The splotch is there to ACCENT the leaves. This was my intention all along. Yes it was.

This is why I Never get any Fire Sauce at the Drive-through!

2006-08-10T12:47:00.000-04:00

Group apologizes for taking three years worth of Taco Bell sauces

Thief in the Night

2006-08-10T09:29:00.000-04:00

Last night, my husband heard a thumping around in a trash can in front of our neighbor's house and he found this baby inside when he checked it out. This was after I had gone to bed, so of course, his first instinct was to immediately rescue the poor baby animal, right? Well, immediately after he ran into the house and found the camera!

Thanks for the blinding light, Pal!

Just Another Manic...Wednesday?

2006-08-09T20:06:00.000-04:00

So, I woke up at 5am today...went straight to the studio and just kept going. I had a couple of projects I wanted to work on. The first was my arch-nemesis..."Ol' Yeller". This beauty hails from the earliest days of my fabric experimentation. I wanted to make a Watercolor quilt, but without being hampered by such constraints as actually READING and FOLLOWING the instructions. I cut out a handful of 2 inch squares, arranged them on a design board and it made a nice lap sized quilt. Of course, when all was said and done, my points were not even in the neighborhood of meeting one another and the size had gone from lap quilt to uh...napkin. Fortunately, before I had pieced it completely, I acknowledged the fact that my points would not meet and added the strips to sort of break up the fact that there are NO straight rows of blocks here. The top languished in the bottom of the unfinished projects barrel for about 6 or 7 years now and resurfaced during "Studio Clean-up '06", so I decided to parole the prisoner and see what I could do to finish it. Before the long sleep, I had already done some sick things to it. I thought I would try a fantasy fabric approach and put a bunch of threads and tulle over it and tried to quilt over it. I about burnt the motor out on my sewing machine and gave up in frustration. A few years back, I actually took it out and pulled all of the quilting stitches out of it, then returned it. So, I took the poor thing out, put some batting behind it, found some of the cheapy fabric I had used to construct it to make a backing and went to town on the quilting. For some reason, although I know how to sew, Free motion quilting freaks me out. I can SAY that I will move slowly and carefully, but once the needle hits the surface, I'm like on CRACK, yo. I have no rhyme or reason, I just go nuts. Since I started in the center, the brunt of my hysteria fell THERE. Hence the inexplicable Rorschak-esque splotch in the center (What do YOU see?)

Here, I am attempting to add some kind of beauty to this mess. Things go better with Cats!

Next on the block (literally) was an Asian block made of vintage kimono silks. I have had these for years now, and had no idea what to do with them, so Voila.

I used the method I read about on Allison Aller's Blog
where you make long strips of fabrics just sewn together, then cut them up into chunks and piece them. This was a very challenging method, which I have not tried before. The problem with this new method (for me) was that I still wound up with tricky triangular spots to fill, but I was able to work around this pretty easily. It really helped me to break out of my original "Bullseye" looking piecing which would start near the center and work out and eventually just turn into long strips because I didn't know any other way to do it. I have to admit that I thought most of the silks were rather plain and ugly on their own, but I rather like them all together. I definitely have an appreciation of how old and high quality they are. To add some different texture, I added in a couple of Asian themed cottons and some Dupioni for solid color.

Finally, I wanted to add some pictures of my studio cats. Yes, Virginia, cat fur IS an embellishment!

Mel-odrama

2006-08-06T16:37:00.000-04:00

This whole mess with Mel Gibson is something I honestly have no weighty opinion on. People get caught drunk driving all the time, and its never THIS big of a story. Frankly, I think he should have blamed Ambien, which is the fashionable thing to do, but blaming the Jews is still pretty in Vogue, so at least he's got that. What I DID find really REALLY funny about all of this is the whole "Boycott" that is going on in Hollywood. Did you know that Rob Schneider has signed some decree that he will NEVER work with Mel Gibson on a project? Boy, that's gotta sting. Rob? Honey? I laughed as hard as anyone else at "Deuce Bigalow" (Mostly because of the Tourette's woman...."ASSLICKER!"), but let me give you some heartfelt advice: Unless Mel Gibson has a MUST FILL walk-on role for some immigrant to call out, "YOU CAN DOOOIT" (Although there WAS a lot of calling out during the crucifixion...I might have missed it) or a project which mentions the words, "Man-gina" or "Surf Ninja"? I suspect that your boycott is not going to have him teetering out on a ledge somewhere, dude. You might want to stick to avoiding tuna or skip the fur on the Man-Whore roles. I'm just saying.
I am not a big fan of Mel Gibson, myself. I mean, c'mon! His remake of "The Life of Brian"?? Nowhere NEAR as funny as the original. Let's just hope that his rehab and the 20 years of "Diversity Tolerance" PSAs that he's going to have to produce works out for him.

Thanks a Latte

2006-08-02T08:39:00.000-04:00

So, I have quit drinking regular brewed coffee every day. Can you believe it? It was wreaking havoc on my stomach; just pure acid to me. But! Iced Lattes from Double Ds seem to do no harm...so I still have that. I only just tried them a few months back, when I saw that they had "Caramel Lite Lattes" and I tried one iced and it was absolutely DELICIOUS. The only problem I had with them is that the caramel settles on the bottom and is hard to stir into the mix, but that's okay. So, I have been getting them...er...nearly daily--After ALL, they are LITE, which, as we all know, means "Without Calories". Every day, I go to DDs, order a caramel lite iced latte, enjoy, lather, rinse, repeat. Then, This one time (at band camp?) I went to CT to visit Mom and ordered one from the DDs there. I drove away and got back on the highway before taking a sip and nearly vomited spontaneously! It tasted like...battery acid! I suspected it was actually an iced caramel flavored coffee, which is quite different than what I ordered. It was so awful, and now I was on the highway, so I wasn't going back to bitch about it. So, I get back home and continue to order daily as usual. Then, I go to a different DDs across town and get the SAME DISGUSTING drink as the one from CT. So, I drove back through the drivethrough and bitched up a storm!! The girls there listened patiently to my tirade before explaining that the latte that has the syrup in it is actually NOT a lite, but a REGULAR caramel latte, and just because mine had skim milk and splenda in it, did not make it LITE. The LITE latte is actually some sort of caramel FLAVORED mix that they add to the drink instead of the beautiful, life-giving caramel syrup. They said that the people who have been making it might not have been trained properly, but that was what I was supposed to have been getting. GROSS! So, they still exchanged it for me, which was very nice, but I have learned a valuable lesson, which is as follows:

Those wishing to donate to me for this valuable information may contribute to the "National Association for the Caffeine Addicted." (Located at Starbucks.) The life you save might be your own...when you prevent some caffeine deprived tweaker from bringing automatic weapons to work.

Actual Conversation

2006-08-01T16:05:00.000-04:00

Honey(to StepsonA): So, what, you're hearing voices? Like Joan of Arc?

StepsonA: (curious look)

Honey: Haven't you ever heard of Joan of Arc?

StepsonA: You mean the guy who built the boat?

Providing Comfort, one Search Term at a Time

2006-07-30T08:28:00.000-04:00

I felt a little bad when I saw that the following phrase (poems how how one feels when they are verbally abused in there marriage) led some poor soul to my blog in the early morning hours. Obviously not a big fan of the boolean search laws, but neither here nor there. Since there WAS no poem, only a number of unrelated terms which happened to be in that sentence, I thought I would put a few poems here so that those seeking empathy on the internet would not be disappointed. Please feel free to add any of your own ideas...this is meant to be therapeutic, after all!

Cherry Blossoms in Spring-An Inspired Haiku Series

oh no you didnt
don't make me come over there
dumbass mamma's boy

What is that shit now?
Your testicles rearranged
all is well again

Your face and my ass
a match quite similar, yes?
as well as the smell

many words for snow
so few car trunks in which to
store loudmouth husbands

I hope that these helped in some way to start the healing..

2006-07-25T14:36:00.000-04:00

OMFG

WARNING: The Sweetness in this video may force you to feel the urge to scrapbook, collect Precious Moments figurines or stencil hearts along your baseboard. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Making up for Lost Time

2006-07-21T15:56:00.000-04:00

Hello all, just back from that crazy "real world" that everyone's talking about. Here are some of the pictures from the doggie playgroup that I have been taking Kai and Luca to. The regulars are a pair of Bernese Mountain Dogs , a pair of Great Danes and a few Lab mixes. There are new visitors each week, though...we had a dalmatian this week. She was the best behaved Dalmation I have ever met, bar NONE. My oldest and youngest son are in some of these pictures

Bonnie, the Blue Harlequin Great Dane, with Kai in the foreground and Luca in the background

The youngest pets Gracie the Bernese Mountain Dog, while Daisy the mix sniffs him and Kai inserts herself into yet ANOTHER picture.

Max, the Bernese Mountain dog, attempting to show Kai who is boss (she had other ideas for him), Gracie and Luca in the back.

The oldest with Bonnie and Max

Clyde the black Great Dane, Bonnie and Max to the right.

-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=-

We have had an off again/on again empty house this summer. The youngest is in South Carolina visiting his Grandmother until August, the stepkids are going back and forth and my daughter has lots more important things to do than hang around here with the lot of us...so, of COURSE I'm getting loads and loads done with the empty house, right? Yeah, right. Actually, I have worked on trying out new multimedia and collage techniques, and I have 2 different altered books going, but sloooowly. I mean, glue pages one day, gesso the page the next day, paint the background the next day, paint another color the next day and so on...really drawing it out. Here is one of the altered books (a kid's boardbook I got in the dollar bin) with just backgrounds finished.

This is the cover background. It is covered with tissue paper and embellished with rub on transfers and fibers.

For this background, I painted green leaves and painted clear resist over them, then when it was dry, I covered a handcarved stamp with gold resist and stamped the swirlies, then painted over the whole thing with purple lumiere. Basically testing whether the resist would..uh..resist.

This background was primed with gesso, which I stamped into with a rubber stamp for texture. I painted with liquid acrylics, overpainted, then sprayed with alcohol. The faint design in the center is actually a clear packing tape transfer of an inkjet print. The design itself is some wacky Celtic/Mayan mandala thing. Only the black ink will transfer when you use an inkjet image.

Here is the Youngest visiting Folley Beach in SC with his Cousin, Nina. This is his first exposure to the ocean...after being born on the eastern seaboard, moving to the western and back to the eastern. Yeah, we make it out of our house a lot.

So that's it...I'm so proud to have "Outdoor" pictures for a change!

They're on to Me

2006-07-19T11:55:00.000-04:00

CNN.com - John Cusack says he has a stalker - Jul 18, 2006

So Take THAT SUCKAZ

2006-07-06T10:23:00.000-04:00

OKCupid! The Bem Sex Role Inventory Test

Feminine
You scored 46 masculinity and 70 femininity!

You scored high on femininity and low on masculinity. You have a traditionally feminine personality.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 99% on masculinity
You scored higher than 99% on femininity

Link: The Bem Sex Role Inventory Test written by weirdscience on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

My Hearing is 20-20

2006-07-05T23:34:00.000-04:00

Actual conversation that took place a few years back.

Me: Honey, lets go to bed early!! (wink wink)

What I THOUGHT he said: Ohh....but I'm all dirty!

Me: OoooOoo...I like it when you're dirty!!

Him: (blank stare)

Me: What??

Him: I SAID...It's only Ten-Thirty!!!

Nevermind That I Live Less than a Mile from the Library

2006-06-27T11:17:00.000-04:00

I know I have been delinquent in keeping up my posts, so here I am to semi-explain myself. The link in the side column Paperbackswap is at least partially responsible. This site is a very simple idea, but a huge concept. You post 9 books (can be paperback, audio or hardcover--anything with an ISBN) and you'll get 3 credits to begin with. You use your credits to pick out books that other people have posted. There is an excellent and varied selection, and if the book you want is not posted, then you can put it on your wishlist, and they automatically send you a message when it is posted. The book will be reserved for you for 48 hours until you can decide whether you want it, or you can set it so that it is automatically ordered if you don't want to take any chances.
Now, if someone orders one of your books, you can print out a label and pay a reduced rate for a delivery confirmation scan bar on the label. You wrap the book (they say with the printout, but unless the book is really small, I use a mailer envelope) and put the postage on it and send it! If you opt for the delivery confirmation, you will receive a credit when the book is scanned at your Post Office...which is good, because media mail is S-L-O-W. But, if you opt not to get the DC, you will get your credit when the sendee receives the book. The average price is around 1.75 to send a book..and that is the only cost. Let me tell you, anything that would get me to wrap books and go to the post office every day is miraculous. I am one of those people who the internet was made for...I loathe regular mail and often get lost on the way to a post office box.

I have been on for 3 weeks now, and I have mailed out 35 books!! I have received 15 books, and there is another (!!!) 30 on the way. The discrepancy is because for some of the books, I was impatient and bought credits. This is a cost of 3 credits for 8.25, which you can pay by paypal or whatever. So, it is a teeny bit more than earning the credits, but still cheaper than buying a 25 cent book on half.com and paying the shipping costs for it! You can sign up for free, but for 8 bucks a YEAR you can become a "boxer", which means that you can pick up to 10 books on another person's list, and that person picks up to 10 books on your list, and you send them. Not sure what the benefit is, but okay...they need cash to keep the site going. If I had to pay 8 bucks just to use the site, I still would.
Anyway, run your little asses over there and sign up. Tell them that robinm sent you, so I get a credit, bitches!

Here is one of my other reasons for my absence from the blogosphere. Luca is not quite as lazy as Kai, and needs constant entertainment, so we find ourselves taking walks walks walks all over the place to keep him happy. In this picture, however, he had been bitten by another dog at daycare and his nose got infected, so he spent half of the day sleeping. They gave him an antibiotic shot at the vet, and within 4 hours: walk walk walk! He is very cute, and maybe a teeny bit more cuddly than Kai, although not nearly as obedient. He sleeps with my daughter very nicely now; no more crate. I am taking Kai and him to a playgroup tonight for dogs over 50 lbs. We went a few weeks ago, and it was a blast! The woman who hosts the playgroups has 2 Bernese Mountain Dogs. One of them is about 18 inches across the shoulders...he is ENORMOUS. A big baby, of course, but massive. He pounded the crap out of Luca the last time...ever see a dog fall ACROSS a lawn? That was Luca; he tumbled for about 25 feet, end over end. They had a good time and they were sufficiently worn out by the time we got home. I have to remember to take pictures this time...they were a riot all together.

That's all the news. I'm going to try to get back for a few posts every now and again, but I'm sort of enjoying spending time in this place they call, how you say? Outdoors?

Thank You Reverend Spooner!

2006-06-18T16:54:00.000-04:00

Am I the only one who realized that Angelina's baby is going to be (a) Shiloh Pitt?

What a Surprise...

2006-06-16T19:08:00.000-04:00

I just don't know how I feel about this...

Greed:	Medium
Gluttony:	High
Wrath:	Medium
Sloth:	Very High
Envy:	Very Low
Lust:	High
Pride:	Medium

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz

At Length

2006-06-14T04:36:00.000-04:00

When I decided to let my hair grow long, I really didn't have a "goal length." I guess I was envisioning a little longer than "Victoria's Secret Model"

and maybe stopping just short of "Appalachian"

Secretly, I know I was going more for "Stripper."

While watching an HBO documentary about "exotic dancers", a description of one of the dance moves caught my attention. She called it, "Dusting", if I remember correctly, and she demonstrated it by leaning her head back and letting her hair brush back and forth across her ass. I turned to my honey and said, "I think I'm going to let my hair grow." To which he, of course, enthusiastically agreed. So, I was brushing my hair out after a shower the other day and was startled to discover that, although not to "Dusting" length, my hair has reached the point where it brushes against my tramp stamp...and that's probably stripperish enough for now. This is the first anniversary of the last haircut I received...and when you find you are using "quadrants" and "sectors" as a mental reference while washing your hair? Might be time for a little trim...

What do I Know?

2006-06-08T09:28:00.000-04:00

My youngest son is always taking pictures of the animals. If one of the animals is doing something cute, HE's the one to catch it. So, of course, with a new puppy, he has been quite active. So, he took this picture that he called "Splinter Babs" I didn't know what he meant by it, so he explained that Splinter Cell was a game where the guy drops down into cages with a knife. So, for fun, I went into photoshop and made this: rendition of Splinter Babs.

I showed it to the youngest and he rolled his eyes and said THAT was not the way it was supposed to be...there were no teeth or claws, and the knife was all wrong. He pointed out that he had already PUT a (Butter??) knife in the picture anyway, which I had missed:

Well, Excuse me. He pointed out that the knife needed to be a survival knife and it needed to be held a different way and that she didn't need the pointy bloody teeth or claws. So, I made this rendition instead, which he deemed appropriate for the gaming world to view. Anyone play Splinter Cell?

Sleepless in Massachusetts

2006-06-02T04:09:00.000-04:00

Well, I guess we got our payback for our first being such a good baby when we got her. Poor Luca has severe separation anxiety as well as an ultrasonic high pitched whine...couple the two, and Nobuddy gets no sleep :( So, I've been downstairs in the living room with him since 2am. He's a love, he really is. The girl we got him from said that he wouldn't ever go on her bed, but when he saw Kai jumping up, he went right on up and settled himself down like he owned the place. Kai is a mite bit jealous, so every time he moved or got a little cranky, she'd start growling and go over and intimidate him...we went through about 15 minutes of this before I decided I'd better take him back downstairs and try the crate thing with him again. He is finally settled down, but every time I move or (God forbid!) leave the ROOM he gets a bit whiney.

But, at least he has a guardian Angel!

A Boy!

2006-06-01T16:53:00.000-04:00

Well, all the tests were positive, and I even know that it's a boy! Of course, it wasn't too hard to tell by the way he peed ;) Presenting: Luca!!

You didn't actually think that *I* was having a baby, did you? Silly you!

A Good Deal

2006-06-01T06:03:00.000-04:00

Notice: I do NOT sell Fiestaware, am not affiliated with anyone who sells it, nor will I get a discount or kickback of any kind for this post today; just a VERY happy and satisfied customer.

A few months back, I bought 8 4-piece place settings of Fiestaware from a seconds dealer for $130. If you know Fiestaware, then you know that this is an incredible price. I asked them to mix up the colors and we got a very nice selection with almost NO repeats. These are seconds, and the worst issue I had with them is little pinpoint "divots" here and there under the glaze...not a big deal. These dishes are very heavy and unbelievably durable and you can also request a single color set. So, anyway, I got a little email today telling of another big deal they were having, so I went over and immediately got a whole buttload more of it. They are selling sets of 8 dinner plates for $25.50!!!! They also have mugs, bowls and salad plates as well. I bought the dinner and salad plates and some more bowls, since these are what we run out of, mostly. The prices would come out to about $105 for 8 place settings. The colors available for the deal are shown below..I X-ed out the ones that are not available. For the record, I don't use the mugs that came with the place settings...they are too small for the kind of coffee drinker I am. I already had some huge cobalt mugs that I got last year for christmas, and I love to use those. I like having assorted colors...they look beautiful on the shelves, and the kids have a blast picking out different ones. I'd have to say that the family favorites are the cinnabar and cobalt.

(Cinnabar, Cobalt, Periwinkle, Tangerine, Sunflower, Plum, Shamrock, Persimmon, Scarlet)

If you were ever thinking of upgrading your everyday dishes, but were maybe worried about little kids, this would be your best bet. Even with my "ballerinas", we have only managed to lose one salad plate (dropped into our cast iron sink, what're ya gonna do?) and that is a pretty good track record, here; considering that we managed to blow through 2 sets of Pfaltzgraff like they were made of fricking eggshells in QUITE short order, before this.

I am going to include 2 different links...if one doesn't work, try the other; if neither works, just go to the website Feistydishes , or email me and I will send you the direct link. I will try it myself after I post.

Fiestaware Sale

Fiestaware Sale2

So, what is going on with me, you ask? Well, we find out today whether we are expecting a new baby!! Wish me luck!

American Idol

2006-05-24T22:07:00.000-04:00

So...Taylor won. I"m gonna file this one under "BIG FAT SURPRISES". You know, like Clay Aiken being gay...no one coulda seen that one coming.

I think this pic is kinda hawt. Oh and how creepy was Clay with that hair???? I'm STILL shuddering.

If I...could be Queen... of da Fo-r-r-r-r-r-est!

2006-05-24T20:33:00.000-04:00

I just can't help myself! When you have an animal this photogenic, it just comes naturally. I got Tess a hot pink feather boa at Michael's today and she totally loves it. She grabbed one end of it and started running off with it streaming along behind her. OTHER ANIMALS were not quite so fun or happy with being princesses. Spoilsport.

24 Season Finale, WTF? (TIVO crowd: SPOILERS!)

2006-05-23T12:22:00.000-04:00

Yeah, I know the feeling. That one sort of tidied up rather too nicely, eh? And I had actually forgotten that Jack's ass was wanted by the Chinese consulate. As soon as the masks were about to come off, I knew who they were. Any theories about next season? I'm thinking...they brainwash him and he becomes a double agent? It actually wasn't too bad a finale, just not enough shooting was done and everything was just too...TIDY. I had this weird weird inkling about Christopher Henderson being shot...did anyone else get the idea that he wasn't REALLY dead? So, we'll probably see him next year. Too bad they couldn't do the same thing with Edgar :(

The Lord Responds to Yesterday's Posting

2006-05-22T16:09:00.000-04:00

Okay, even *I* am not stupid enough to ignore THIS connection. Yesterday evening, before I left for work (around 5:45pm) it started turning dark. Suddenly the sky was nearly black and the wind picked up. We heard a loud bang outside and my husband went to the front door to see that a column from our little front portico had been blown out. As he opened the door, an old maple, which had been imbedded in the sidewalk in front of this house for at least 80 years, suddenly just tore out of the ground! It crashed down into the streets and into the yards between our houses, but as we looked around, we realized it hadn't touched anything except the neighbor's small picket fence. The neighbor had been outside bringing in some potted plants out of the storm when the tree came down in front of her. The car in front of the roots is my husband's car. The tree's roots and the dirt brushed the grill as it came up, but no damage to the car. We were pretty lucky in all respects. We knew this tree was going to have to come out eventually...it had been hit by lightning, according to the previous owner and was rotting from the inside out. It is a wonder it hadn't come down before...it was a wonder it hadn't hit any cars or any houses or any people! One huge limb had come down in a storm a year or so ago and didn't hit anything, either. within 20 minutes of the tree coming down, DPW was there with chainsaws (in the midst of 2 inch hail pelting down and 50-60 mile per hour winds!) and this morning, when I arrived home, the tree was almost entirely broken down and chipped up by road crews. It is kind of sad...the previous owner, a nice (but probably a little on the 'tetched side) old guy
called the tree, "The family tree" and another old guy who lives up the street was telling us how they all used to climb this tree when they were kids.

Meanwhile, I HAD been busy answering an interview over at Sparkling Diamond's blog which was RUDELY interrupted by the ensuing power outage (the tree yanked a couple of wires in front of the house) so I am going to get over there to finish the interview. Oh, and I'm removing the horrible link in yesterday's post...I know I'm headed to hell, but I have no desire to punch my ticket early!

This was what I saw on my way into work:

Maybe there is hope for me after all :)

And on the Seventh Day, The Lord Smote 30 Days

2006-05-19T20:39:00.000-04:00

Yes, now I am going to hell. No, REALLY. I am REALLY going to hell.

It all started when we bought our puppy. We immediately read books on dominance and how to be the "alphas" in the family, which the puppy (being brilliant) quickly learned. With one exception. The youngest. Kai see's the youngest as her equal and REFUSES to obey or respect him in any shape or form. In fact, she will go out of her way to do whatever the OPPOSITE is of whatever he asks. If we want Kai to stop some annoying behaviour, all we need to do is to call, "Hey, Youngest! Come take the dog out for a walk!" Kai immediately goes and hides under the nearest desk or under the nearest mommy or daddy. The kids have assigned chores to complete. My daughter is "Mess Crank" (in charge of the kitchen) and my son is "The Beastlord" (in charge of the pets) so he is the one in charge of taking the dog out to pee/poop. Each morning, he tries to get her to go outside on the leash, and each morning, hilarity ensues. She will run to the door like she IS going to go, but then fake and run away. She'll let him get the leash on her and go to the door, then she backs up, yanks her head out of her collar and runs away. Then he'll follow her upstairs and a spirited chase begins...around and around the house. I realized it looked just like all of the chase scenes on Benny Hill, so I'd start singing the "Yakety Sax" song. Of course, only my husband and I understand the reference, so I started looking for a sound clip so that my son could hear it. It is perfectly suited to chase scenes. This is where things started to go wrong. Really, REALLY wrong. As in, I'm not even Catholic and I feel like I need to get to a confessional and start chanting some Hail Marys. I found...[really sick link which I have now deleted] If you are blasphemy-lite, then you might enjoy this, instead. (Courtesy of Margalit)

I removed the original link...it was WAY too over the top.

House Rules!

2006-05-19T19:24:00.000-04:00

There's no question that one of my favorite TV shows right now is "House", but I find myself having to admit that thank GOD the show is a riot, because otherwise it would have been cancelled long ago. Why? For those who have not seen the show, this is a quick summary that you can use for just about ANY 'House' episode. If you are a regular watcher and you miss a show, just bring up this post.

=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Opening Scene: People doing stuff. Usually, there is a person who develops a mild medical emergency as a smoke screen to the ACTUAL crisis that will ensue. Nevermind that we all watch the previews all week long and already KNOW who the main victim will be. Main Victim does something really alarming, like seize, bleed or go catatonic.

(intro theme music)

Next: House does stuff. This usually consists of brutal sarcasm, verbal abuse, borderline sexual harrassment and liberal Vicodin popping. House comes up with a scheme to avoid seeing patients in the ER as all the doctors who have privileges are required to do. Beleaguered colleagues shake their heads and smile, or splutter and stalk off in a huff.

Next: Someone (usually Dr. Wilson) clues House in on the "Odd-case-that-no-one-else-can--figure-out". House shoots off whatever seems to be the obvious cause and walks away. The clue-ER shouts out some vital information that makes this case not obvious and House suddenly MUST be involved.

Next: House shares the case with his colleagues. More brutal sarcasm and verbal abuse, more shaking of heads or spluttering, lots of Vicodins popped. The list of possible diagnoses are detailed on a white board and not one person can agree to anything. House tells them to look for all of them. Since Dr. Foreman is black, he is the natural choice to break into the patient's home to look for items that the patient and their family are (naturally) lying about and/or hiding from their medical team. He fumes about this briefly, before breaking out his gloves, mask, and lockpicking kit and going off to work.

Next: Not a single bit of labwork or diagnostic will exist that backs up one diagnosis. Everyone is frustrated. Now is a good time for an MRI! (and more Vicodin.)

Next: Hapless patient loaded into MRI. Invariably, they will begin to have an anaphylactic reaction, bleed, seize or go into respiratory arrest. Hapless patient rescued from MRI vessel of death. (This happens in EVERY episode and I am NOT kidding. If someone says MRI, then some sort of disaster will ensue; You could develop a drinking game around this.)

Next: Medical crisis is narrowed down to 2 different solutions; the treatments to which are not only conflicting, but potentially lethal and will most definitely cause permanent damage to some organ. By this time, so many things have been tried that the patient and/or their family members are (not surprisingly) wary of new ideas and refuse to give approval. House shows up to verbally abuse, or harrass them until they change their minds. It is decided that something must be better than letting the patient die (the timeline of which will have already been decided, despite lack of diagnosis) so ONE of the treatments is started in hopes that the patient will either recover or die. Yay! Patient appears to recover!

Next: House and colleagues are somewhere else in the hospital sharing their victory (more verbal abuse and Vicodin) when pagers start going off.

Next: SURPRISE! Patient is not better! In fact, patient is doing something distressing, like dying or seizing or attempting to smother their newborn.

Next: House is seeing (verbally abusing) patients in the ER quite reluctantly after whatever latest scheme to get out of doing it is foiled. While treating a mildly ill patient, something shows up or something is said that causes House to pause and think for a moment. You can SEE the lightbulb flashing in his head.

Next: SURPRISE! It wasn't one diagnosis, it was 2 diagnoses! One condition's symptoms fooled the doctors into thinking one thing, while another one was lurking beneath just waiting to come out. Also, the patient is probably a dirty whore that was doing something they shouldn't have been doing to cause this to happen. Proper treatment is begun and the patient recovers while "Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley plays in the background.

Next: House broods alone somewhere or rides off on his motorcycle. The end.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

See all the work I do for you? I've just freed up an ENTIRE hour for you on Tuesday evenings! Use it wisely.

Oh World, FEAR Me Now!

2006-05-19T08:11:00.000-04:00

I got an IPOD Shuffle for Christmas (yeah, stop being jealous) and in TRUE 30 Days fashion, I am just NOW getting the thing loaded up to use. I must say that my kids had their Ipods up and running within about 2.3 seconds of opening the wrappings. I, on the other hand...I like to ponder over such perplexing gifts; especially those that come with the dreaded--"INSTRUCTION MANUAL OF DOOM." I can't read instructions, not to save my freakin life. If something isn't totally obvious to me, and it isn't something necessary, like...oh, a ventilator to prevent respiratory arrest...you can bet that it's gonna sit on the shelf until 'the right time.' Well, my 'right time' had come, so I plugged the thing into the computer and put in Itunes and started buying songs left and right, and downloading like nobody's business. The thing was, when I put the headphones on, no music! Since my nature is to assume that *I* did something wrong (who wouldn't?) the next logical step is to repeat the procedure about 298 times, or until red in the face, panting and popping anti-hypertensives like tic-tacs. It was time for the experts. Oh ye with little adolescents, surely YE can imagine the sighing and the rolling of eyes that ensued. And the just barely 'skating on the edge of patience' tones, as they explained that I just couldn't plug the Ipod in, that much much MORE needed to be done. Little bastards...did I mention they were adopted? I did right then, I'll tell you. The End. And that is how I came to be nominated for "Mother of the Year" (Your honor.)

I did eventually get the stupid thing running. I had a lot of fun downloading music for it, but why is it that when pressed for favorite songs or artists that you can never think of any?? Fortunately, I was able to think of a few. Some of my favorites: Round and Round, by Jo Potter, Insane in the Brain by Cypress Hill, and Click, Click, Boom by Saliva, . Because, you know...they go well together, as well as pretty much demonstrating the sequence of events in one of my normal days.
So, what's on YOUR Ipod? (That I'm sure YOU had no trouble getting running)

Elevator Music Interludes

2006-05-17T09:07:00.000-04:00

I've thought about putting a biography on here so many times, if only to organize my thoughts and see how it looks in print, but I realized..whoa...everyone can see this (yeah, I JUST realized that!) and then I realized that THIS is how it would end up reading:

0-18: Blah Blah Blah Blah

18-30:{==Music from 'Girl From Ipanema'==}

30-Now: Blah Blah Blah Blah

So, how is THAT for a concise biography?

Kinda makes that long ass John Adams book look a little redundant.

Late Late Late

2006-05-15T19:11:00.000-04:00

Okay, as part of my "Google is going to rule the world, eventually" theory, I downloaded a couple of cool apps. One of them was a web page accelerator, which claims to have saved me 12.3 minutes since I downloaded it less than a week ago. The other was a cool little thingy which tells me when I go to a webpage whether or not there are comments about that webpage elsewhere, and where they are. Loading up my blog, I noticed that there were comments, so I went out and found several posts, which was TRES cool. However, I discovered I had been tagged by Daydreamer of Oz (Love the new template!!) and hadn't even REALIZED it and here it is almost a month later. Oh well, the story of my life. So, I'll go ahead and respond to the challenge, which is near and dear to my heart. The object is to name 10 simple pleasures in your life; Here are mine:

1. The smell of lilacs
2. Purring cats
3. My honey's laugh
4. The smell of freshly mown grass
5. Sleeping during a rainy day
6. The opportunity to be a smartass
7. Star magazine (See also: Guilty pleasures)
8. Watching my dog play with the other dogs at daycare
9. Listening to audiobooks on my way to work
10. Reading comments on my blog :)

See? Really simple! I just heard that there is a stupid Bush speech on tonight which might possibly delay the beginning of 24, which will make 24 run past the time I need to leave for work, which will spark the white hot fury of 1000 suns. Pray for me.

Out With the Old...

2006-05-11T08:02:00.000-04:00

So here is my new template. I totally scrapped the old one and replaced it...I couldn't stand that I was just putting new pictures and colors over the crappy old blogspot template. This was a lot of fun to make, but it took HOURS. I really need to become more familiar with HTML. This was made at a kind of DIY site called psyco (aptly enough for me!)

Next, I'll be Scrapbooking

2006-05-09T14:14:00.000-04:00

Here is another albatross around my neck that I will be glad to get rid of. This is for a "first line of a poem" swap that I joined and MAN am I late. This is the last one to send out...the others were for different poems and this one I kept thinking I needed to add on and add on and add on...so it IS quite overdone. Matboard, acrylics, fabric, neocolor II crayons, packing tape transfer, rubber stamps, UTEE, sawdust, potting soil, rusted bolts, shards of glass, coffee grounds and starburst wrappers. Lalala, you get the drift, it's MULTIMEDIA. Can you guess the poem? It won't take a genius, because I named the file after it.

Aliens Contacted me Through my Dental Fillings

2006-05-07T15:57:00.000-04:00

To provide a little balance to the last post, I found the Popular Mechanics article referenced in the Loose Change video that does provide evidence contrary to a "Conspiracy Theory" view of the events of 9/11. Like I said, I don't buy into the "Conspiracy" idea completely, but if even a shred of what they (Loose Change) are saying is true, it IS quite thought-provoking. I'll return you to your normally scheduled stuff and nonsense on Monday.

Did I Come to the Wrong Blog?

2006-05-05T21:19:00.000-04:00

At the risk of being deemed political or worse, SERIOUS, I felt I should share this video. I guess that it has been out for a little while, so some of you may already be aware of it, but for those of you who aren't, it might be an eyeopener. Just to qualify things: I am not saying that I buy into the premises behind this video wholesale; there ARE some things which I found to be not overly believable, and others that I think might be a long stretch. Maybe someone who is familiar with Loose Change or some of the propoganda they are involved in knows something contrary to this and I invite response and discussion. I do NOT consider myself attentive enough to be politically active nor knowledgeable enough to even be politically AWARE, really. I have no idea where I fall in terms of "Left" or "Right" and I tend to be inherently suspicious of anyone who knows EXACTLY where they DO fall with no doubt as to how steadfast those convictions are. I fully acknowledge that I am naiive. With that said, here is the link.

Loose Change

The video is VERY LONG; 1 hour 20 minutes, but you can download it there, too.

On a somewhat lighter (but still left-er) note, the site where I heard about this video is a very HILARIOUS videocast called The Show. Ze Frank ROCKS! Go now! Make sure that you go back through the archives and bookmark him and go back every (week)day. He is a riot. Have a great weekend, everybody!

LOL!!

2006-05-03T22:53:00.000-04:00

For any little "mice" that are visiting me: Trust me, that service doesn't work! Here's a little snip to demonstrate:

Operating System Macintosh MacOSX
Browser Safari 2.0
Mozilla/5.0 (Macintosh; U; Intel Mac OS X; en) AppleWebKit/418 (KHTML, like Gecko) Safari/417.9.2
Javascript version 1.5
Monitor
Resolution : 1440 x 900
Color Depth : 32 bits
Time of Visit May 3 2006 4:55:28 pm

Well, if all else fails, you can always threaten them with your lawyers :)

I am SO Getting Some...

2006-04-30T17:06:00.000-04:00

This is my hubby's early "Father's Day" present!

Sorry for being so blogladaisical lately, I'm working on some stuff that I will post this week.

Robin's New Job Description

2006-04-19T20:01:00.000-04:00

Hehe...

Meme Tuesday

2006-04-18T16:17:00.000-04:00

This is one that I made up...because I like to convince myself that I am important!

Top Bizarre Pet Peeves
1. I hate fidgeting
2. I hate people's feet touching me
3. I hate it when people fidget with things with their FEET; example: kids picking the laundry basket up with their feet, or turning it over and putting their feet on it.
4. I hate hugging people that I don't know VERY well and will sneak out of a lot of functions early without saying goodbye if I suspect that people will try to hug me goodbye.
5. I hate it when I hear phrases repeated over and over; Example: “Mom..mom...mom...mom..."

Top Choices that Prove I am Actually a 13 yr old boy
1. Movie choices; example: Dumb and Dumber (or anything by the Farrelly Brothers), Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, Wayne's World (I and II)
2. TV choices: South Park, Beavis and Butthead, The Simpsons, Cops
3. Personal tagline choice: “Hehe...you said [abut, abreast, caulk, Virginia etc...]

Top Phrases I Have Said that Prove I am Actually My Mother
1. “Could you please pick your feet up when you walk? You're shuffling like a freakin gorilla!”
2. Well, if you were wearing something on your feet, then that wouldn't have happened, now would it?
3. Could you pull your pants up? Everyone can see your crack! [hehe...I said CRACK!!]
4. Could you turn the Freakin' [Radio, Ipod, TV, Video Game] down? Jeezus...[You're going to go deaf, I can't hear myself think, The neighbors are calling the police]
5. Does the TV HAVE to be on?

Top Signs that the Apocalypse is Upon us
1. Arnold Schwarzenegger is a governor
2. Adrian Brody is an action hero
3. Tom Cruise is an annoying pest who charms NO ONE
4. Keifer Sutherland is a BADASS of Chuck Norris-ian proportion
5. Predicting the apocalypse by means of popular actors.

Truckstop Trixie

2006-04-14T05:49:00.000-04:00

I can't figure out how to post this live on here, so I will provide the link. It is actually based on a real conversation that my honey and I had.

Bookworm Thursday

2006-04-13T19:45:00.000-04:00

I went to the library yesterday afternoon and got 3 books out. Each one of them, I read a few pages and had to put down. BOORRRRING!

#1: Naked Conversations: Long story short? Employees who blog make businesses seem friendlier, YAY! Now how do we manage to say this enough to fill 272 pages?

#2: Don't Know Much About Mythology: This guy has written a couple of other books, one of which I listened to on tape, 'Don't Know Much About The Civil War'. This one, however, was a yawn fest.

#3 If Nobody Speaks of Remarkable Things: Well, then I guess they'd say alot about this book. I don't even know what it is about, to tell you the truth. I felt a coma coming on midway through the third page.

I did get Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire on CD, though. I am that person you may have heard of who hasn't read this entire series; see me, FEAR ME! I am also the most ardent Stephen King fan who HADN'T read "Dreamcatcher," but I started taking it to work and somehow managed to get into it and finally finished it. I couldn't get into it at ALL after it was first written. I even got a cool new term to use from it...SHIT WEASEL!

What popular books out there have YOU never read, either?

Fenway Frankly my Dear, I don't Give a Damn!

2006-04-12T13:36:00.000-04:00

Ahhh confessions and open letters...the mainstay of your average American blogger. I am not sure why it is that we all think that our confessions somehow make entertaining reading, but I know that I like writing them. So here is another one for you.

My name is Robin. I live in Massachusetts and I don't give a rat's ass about baseball OR the Red Sox. This is going to be the longest day of my life...WHOA! 24 flashback there, sorry!

I guess opening day just came and went and I'll tell you what, I just don't care! Not that I have ever pretended to care before this, or that somehow I feel that this makes me a freak among humans...it's just the facts.

I grew up with a Dad who basically lived, ate and breathed sports. I'm not kidding, either! He basically ate little more than peanuts, crackerjacks and hot dogs, and that is the God's honest truth...my mom logs on here and I am sure she will attest to it! He managed to groom me for a short period of time when I was about 10 and turn me into a Red Sox fan "mini me", but, like with a lot of things in my life, I lost interest...or went into puberty or something like that. I've been ambivalent ever since.

Now, in the general course of human events (mine ESPECIALLY) such a person who loathes such a noble institution as this, would be fated to meet and fall irretrievably in love with the president of the fan club of this noble institution. I am here to tell you that this did NOT happen to me. My husband probably has even LESS knowledge of the local teams than I do. We roll our eyes in tandem when our diehard sox fan friends launch into stunning stories of pop flies, green monsters, outrageous parking prices and the amazing exploits of such superheroes as Nomar, Papi and Captain Caveman. We share a secret smile between us when others are screaming in hysterics at some ballpark outrage or another.

I think that in the long run, we are going to live longer than our fan friends. After all, we aren't going to spend our lives with the highlight of each year being the privilege to occupy a 30 dollar space on a bleacher seat in 101 degree weather, swilling 10 dollar cups of beer and screaming so loudly that veins burst in our temples, the anxiety of an ancient "curse" has never bothered us, and we have never spent a weekend locked in our bedroom with the lights turned off, hugging our stuffed "Wally" and sobbing softly because our team missed its chance to make it to the series!

So there you have it; another exciting revelation shared. I feel closer to all of you already. Well, except for you Yankee fans...HA! CURSE DENIED, ya BASTIDS!

UPDATE: I just read this today and thought it was pretty funny

Little Johnny Damon Gets No Respect

Out on the Shelves Soon!

2006-04-05T22:39:00.000-04:00

Weekly Update

2006-04-05T14:37:00.000-04:00

I have decided that I am NOT going to participate in the "Lost Blogs" promotion after all. Email me if you care to know why, but there is really no earth-shattering reason. I have been sort of mad at my blog (and at blogger for being a tw@t), but I am trying to come to terms with all of this and get back to some semblance of regular entries.

I thought I would start back off with a meme. Now, this is a meme which I have actually thought long and hard about doing. I don't know why I am turning it into a federal issue, but it DOES bother me in a way. I stole this one from the lovely Daydreamer of Oz and when I first saw it, I jumped gleefully on it, thinking it was tailor made JUST for me, but then I got a stab of...I don't know...conscience?..or indigestion...no, conscience, yeah THAT'S it. The task is to list 10 things you would like to say to other people that you know that you would not, could not or should not ever get a chance to say; don't say who they are, use each person only once. (herein lies SOME of the problem) So anyway, I thought I really wanted to do this thing right away...cuz BOY do I have shit to say, but it turned out to be harder than I thought. Especially since most of the shit I would WANT to say is probably narrowed down to a very few individuals. Surprising, since I am such a venemous little bitch, but true. THEN came the pangs...hmmm...I've sort of kept things on a more upbeat, humorous scale...do I really want to be a downer? Then again, I should be blogging for ME, not for anyone else, right? And so on and so forth. Then came the questions of timing. I would start thinking about doing this while I was at work, so I'd want to go right to one of the computers and start typing it in. HOWEVER, lately, I have become a little concerned (READ: Paranoid) that things that I type may someday be printed out in front of me one fine sunny day when I will suddenly be on the lookout for a new career choice. One that has a polyester uniform and a nametag. One in which I will be asking, "Do you want fries with that?" on a regular basis. So ANYWAY, for chrissake-not-that-you-want-to-read-all-of-THIS-shit, without any further ado, here it is.

10 Things I Hate about Y'all
XO~With Love, From Me~XO

1. (removed by request)

2. You are an evil phoney bitch.

3. Shut the fvck UP, for Chrissake! I love you, but DAMN! Do you ever STOP?

4. I don't like your tone when you speak to clients, staff or oncoming shifts. You embarrass me.

5. Yeah. Those are real. uh huh.

6. You are an idiot. You let people take advantage of you, welcome it, even. You have been warned so many times about the people in your life who abuse you, but you refuse to listen. Here's a clue: If you don't at least TRY to do something about it, then you have lost the right to whine to every frigging person on earth about it.

7. I know you stabbed me in the back more than once, you know I know it, so why not let's NOT pretend we're "old friends."

8. I acted like I forgave you, because I felt bad about all that happened to you, but I never did. You got what you deserved...KARMA baby!

9. (removed by request)

10. I have never believed any of your bullshit, but I love you anyway.

As always, Your Mileage May Vary (wow! haven't said THAT in a long time!) any resemblance between people on this list and you, or anyone else you THINK you know, is purely coincidental. Please see a doctor if you experience shortness of breath, longwindedness, apoplexy, sudden bursting aneurysms or rage. Please see ME if you experience an erection that lasts longer than 4 hours (email above)

A Heartfelt Plea

2006-03-23T11:23:00.000-05:00

Dear Blogger,

Lately, it seems as though you have been pulling away from me. Yes you have, you can't deny it...don't try to reassure me. It seemed innocent at first-a long lag when trying to access pages...my posts not showing up until the next day, but that's okay. You're busy, I know I am just one in a long queue of people waiting for your time, and I know I'm not perfect. I've had my weeks at a time when I just needed my space...and you took me back every time! But lately...I don't know. It just seems like you are going out of your way to avoid me! I mean..just a few days ago, you wouldn't accept my post, and all I could get was a message saying, "File server not found." What is this? You don't KNOW me anymore...our 10 months together can be swept under the carpet just like that? You apologized and you made it right, but now you won't take my pictures. This hurts, Blogger, it really hurts. I know there's probably some cheap explanation, and "You're sorry" and that "Engineers are working night and day, blah blah blah" but it might be too little, too late. Please woo me back, Blogger...please make it the way it was in the old days when all we worried about was the fact that I had to use frigging IE if I wanted to post a picture...can you do that?

Because if you don't, I am SO dragging this shit over to Wordpress.

Love and Kisses,

Robin

OMFG!

2006-03-23T08:52:00.000-05:00

Could anything be funnier? I don't think so. Pissing on Pooh...oh lord, it's poetic, it's ironic, it's alliterative...it works on so many levels!!!

artnet Magazine - News

Angst. It's Not Just for Breakfast Anymore

2006-03-22T21:28:00.000-05:00

Whoa! Where to start! I have a couple of really fun stupid memes that I wanted to do, and now they are piling up in my drafts, so I am going to pull this one out. So fun!

Okay, This one comes from The Reluctant Housewife, a cool new (for me) blog that I'm soaking up. The Challenge? To post something dreadful that you wrote in your formative years. Well, for most of us (I really should stick to speaking for myself, but...) that means SOMETHING that we wrote in our formative years. I know that somewhere hidden is a diary that I wrote at 13, which would be EVER so much more juicy than this stuff, but this stuff is awful enough. This stuff comes from a notebook we were required to keep for creative writing in my senior year of high school. I should also add that this challenge is based on a live show called Mortified, based on this website, which I present for your viewing amusement. See you next year in real life, because you'll be holed up for days reading this shit.
Basically, we were supposed to keep a sort of stream of consciousness journal, which we would then use to come up with stories and essays. Pretty standard Creative Writing Stuff. The first one I actually used to write a story, which I will have to unearth somewhere here. I don't know where the shit about Leonard Nimoy came from, but I did used to smoke a lot of pot when I was writing, so that would explain a lot.

The next two pages are based on an actual conversation that I had with a boyfriend. Obviously, I was all about the control in my relationships back then. (Yes, only back then, of course) and I fancied myself not only an atheist, but a socialist. OOooOo. The only thing I was missing was the beret and the machine gun to be a total Patricia Hearst clone. Oh shit. I just realized, probably half of you aren't going to know who Patricia Hearst is. Le Sigh.

How cool is THIS?

2006-03-18T17:27:00.000-05:00

A Bit Of Both

You are 50% Calvin and 50% Hobbes

Calvin & Hobbes, like a scruffy yin and yang, are in perfect balance within you. Like Calvin, you're weird, a bit insecure, and can be a trouble-maker. But like Hobbes, you're down to earth and sensitive. It's a risk to say it here, after just a ten question test, but I'll bet you're smarter than most. Both Calvin and Hobbes are crafty, clever characters, and any one made from equal parts of each is a force to be reckoned with.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 42% on calvin
You scored higher than 26% on hobbes

Link: The Calvin Or Hobbes Test written by gwendolynbooks on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

OKCupid! The Calvin Or Hobbes Test

OMFG! 911 ASPCA ASAP!!!! A.K.A "A Rough Life" Revisited

2006-03-16T22:52:00.000-05:00

Well, since Blogger is being a butt, I am hoping this will publish. I am trying to be patient, because it IS a free service, after all...but just kind of annoying.

At the North Central Mass Bloggin Bitchez Alliance (NCMBBA) First Annual Conference and Orange Julius Swill (TM), the conversation turned to our pets and their various attributes as well as abuses rained upon their innocent little heads by us, their undeserving slaves. I have uploaded this, as an example of the horror. Kai comes home from a hard day of playing with puppies at Daycare and can hardly hold her head up...do we run upstairs and get the tempur-pedic foam pillows from the bed? Oh no. She gets a ratty old couch pillow. As you can see, she is horrified and can barely keep her eyes open from the torment.

Here is another example:

Do you see any lambswool in the basket on the left? No? I didn't think so. That poor kitten is in there with NO padding whatsoever. I can't watch anymore...it's just so...awful.

Meme Tuesday

2006-03-14T22:18:00.000-05:00

STOLEN FROM: Old Lady of the Hills

THE RULES:
1. Choose a search engine (I use Google, mostly) and click on "Images".
2. Choose 5 random blogfriends (Or not so random, your choice)
3. Think of a word that you feel best describes your blogfriend
4. Do an IMAGE SEARCH on that word.
5. Pick the image that best fits your pal and post it.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Michele

-===-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Christine

"Homegirl"

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Jody

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Butterstar:

"Greener"

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--=

Arlee

"Colorful"

Waiting to Ex-Halen

2006-03-13T16:51:00.000-05:00

Bless me David Lee, for I have sinned. It has been probably 6 or 7 years since I last played my "Diver Down" CD. David, I promise that I will have NO other lead singer before or AFTER you, and that I will steadfastly maintain my firm conviction that Van Halen, in the words of my older son, "Totally Blew Monkey Balls" after you left and the-other-who-shall-not-be-named attempted to usurp your spot.
I shall never fail to say "How high?" when listening to "Jump," and I totally forgive you for the sins of wearing spandex and leather pants after 40 in your later tours.

However, I am nothing, if not human. I confess that I totally jammed out to "Right Now" on the way to work last night.

I am SO going to hell.

New Levels of Horror

2006-03-10T19:41:00.000-05:00

So...somehow or another the planets aligned in some fashion so that I was actually able to take a picture that I didn't absolutely detest. I don't expect this luck to continue for long, so I'm uploading it now before blogger finally implodes. I look a bit like a crazed person in this picture, but..well, it's me! HA, one resolution down. Now, part of the reason for this is that I have a new fresh burst of confidence, having gone to the my heritage website to find out exactly who looks like me. The results were: Lisa Kudrow, Juliette Lewis, Debra Winger, Geena Davis, Megawati Sukarnoputri (WTF???) and, get THIS...ZAMFIR. When I told Honey this, he said...well, I don't know about the PAN flute, but...

But it's a Dry Heat...

2006-03-10T12:43:00.000-05:00

Finally getting the architecture postcards finished up (I SUCK!) I thought I'd put my new Epson cx4600 through its paces and try the scan feature. It was a little persnickety, and I'm still not sure I won't have to bring the whole thing back. I got it for $40 under regular price, and another $10 off for getting the floor model, but I DID make sure I got a 2 year warranty, since I heard that the print heads can clog on these really easily. Since it was the demo, the ink was low and the ink light keeps blinking and it won't print ANYTHING, not even a faded picture...so, there might be something wrong and I might have to bring it back and upgrade to a 4800...oh dear.

Honey Smacks us Some Dinner

2006-03-09T20:15:00.000-05:00

So, my Mom gave me her pressure cooker over christmas. Let me just tell you that I love this damned thing. It makes THE best corned beef, bar none. It also cooks a really mean pot roast, and I try to follow the same recipe that my Mom picked up from a neighbor probably more than 30 years ago. (I know she'll probably be on here leaving a comment with the exact date, so I'll leave the date open for now) Anyway, the recipe is so freakin easy. Sear the meat (hehe, I said meat) in the pressure cooker until brown on all sides. Add a can of cream of mushroom soup and some red wine, put the cover and the weight on, wait until it starts to sizzle, turn the temp down to medium, then let it cook...45 minutes, an hour...depending on how big the roast is. What kind of roast? I don't frickin know, I buy a chunk o' meat. This is a nearly foolproof recipe that turns out perfectly every time. Enter: ME.
The first time I tried the recipe, it turned out as good as I remembered...the roast fell apart, the sauce that it makes is just superb, and we ate like pigs. The next time...not so much. I couldn't get the thing to sizzle, and I futzed around with the damned thing for way too long and in the end, the roast was not cooked enough. A few more semi-successful tries later and we are at this evening's fiasco. The cooker was not sizzling, so I pressured it down, took the lid off and cleaned and futzed with the rubber seal. (hehe, I said...SEAL) put it back on and Voila! it worked like a charm! Maybe...TOO well? So, I let it sizzle for an hour or so and figure that it's done, so I take it out, pressure it down, then try to open it up. NO GO. I tried forcing it, and the top handle broke off. In a panic, I call my honey to come help and he comes out and proceeds to rip off rest of the handle and basically anything else we could use to grasp to open the lid. So, we send the youngest down to get a hammer, and basically, we had to slam the shit out of lid to open it up and get our dinner out. While bashing the lid with the hammer, Honey breaks down in hysterical laughter at the whole situation and turns to me and says, "Get the camera, I know THIS is getting blogged!" Witness: The carnage===>

Dinner was fabulous, by the way.

I have a dream, Ja!

2006-03-09T10:35:00.000-05:00

Okay, is there anyone else out seen the new hilarious Volkswagon commercials ? Anyone else also find them just the teensiest bit offensive? As a proud, card carrying TAP (Teutonic American Princess) I think I am a bit tired of seeing my people spoofed. That is all.

I Hope the Salt Dissolves their Finger

2006-03-08T07:19:00.000-05:00

It seems I never run out of "bloggable moments" around here. My post about the carwash PRECEDED an unsolicited walk-by "Wash-me"ing scrawled into my rear window over the weekend. My car was blanketed in a thick "Protective" covering of salt after a trip to CT during a snowstorm and really stood out from the rest of the cars in the neighborhood. So, I decided to take it to a drive-through carwash at a gas station. First of all, I had to wait LITERALLY 45 minutes behind 4 other cars, rather than my fervent dream that those ahead of me would spontaneously "part" like the Red Sea in tribute to my OBVIOUS extreme need. When I finally got into the bay, it turned out to be a touchless carwash (no brushes--although I am sure the rest of the world that actually does WASH their car more than every 3 years knows this) so I was a little skeptical about the effectiveness, but it was a pretty vigorous wash. As I was leaving, though...I took one last look in the rear view mirror. Sure enough, you can still see the "Wash Me" as clear as day. Bastards.

Wednesday Facts and Figures

2006-03-01T12:03:00.000-05:00

Number of feet that I live from a Carwash: 500
Number of times that I have washed my car since moving here a year and a half ago: Zero.

2006-02-28T23:00:00.000-05:00

Moving on from my previous post about my great schedule, I am reminded of WHY I appreciate my working schedule so much...I've DONE the dayshift routine. Now, I had worked nightshifts for roughly 5 or so years and I didn't have much of a problem with them. I loved to go home and sleep during the day...weird, but true. I can do it! Anyway, I started out working Mondays through Thursday nightshift as the weekend supervisor (same place I am working now) and I had done that for about a year or so...really enjoyed it, but there was one CRITICAL incident that caused me to make probably the WORST career decision ever. Thinking about it now, it is actually sort of hilarious, and I really even sort of thought so when it happened about 4 years ago, but I also realize that it must have been VERY traumatic to me.

At this time, TB/NH and I lived in a small condo in a smart little T-stop west of Boston. When we first rented the place, we rented it from the original owners, but a few years in, a Heartless Corporation (tm) came in and bought out all the private owners (within another few years, our rent would nearly double!) So, the above mentioned HC decided that a total renovation was in line for these 20 little buildings and they were going to finish them. All. In. A. Month. Things were not so bad to begin with, I dealt with the noise of drilling,and hammering outside my window while I slept, and only ONE worker was able to surprise me changing my clothes in my bedroom with the blinds partially open. Then, they had to replace the windows. They made an appointment with me to have the guys come and install them, so I came home from working nightshift, took a quick nap, then woke up and let the window installers in to install the windows. This didn't take much time, maybe 45 minutes, and when they were done, I undressed (an important detail here) got back into bed and went straight to sleep.

I don't know how long it was, but it couldn't have been more than 20 minutes or so, I hear a loud knock, the door opening and about 3 or 4 guys were back in the apartment!! Before I could react, they were actually IN my bedroom going to the window!!! We had a waterbed at the time, so I guess I managed to sink enough into the mattress that they didn't notice that I was there. I pull the covers up to just over my ears when I sleep, so I just pulled them up over my head so they wouldn't see me when they turned. They were there arguing about the installation for a few minutes, then they went to compare it to the window in another room. On the way out of that room, one of the guys turns to speak to the other guys behind him, and he caught me peeking out from under the covers. He didn't say anything, or even react...just turned and walked out with the rest of them.

A couple of things happened after this. One of them was, I started wearing frigging PAJAMAS to bed. The other one was much more bizarre. It was like some old gypsy had reached out a gnarled finger to curse me...I stopped sleeping! I would come home in the morning from work and I would just...NEVER SLEEP. I got tired, and I know that I had a lot of those just barely conscious-y type naps when I would get totally exhausted, but there was NO real sleep. I started to get that "Haunted" look that they talk about in the bodice buster type novels. I was nervous all the time, couldn't relax, was popping benadryl like it was going out of style. One day, I took a look in the mirror and I realized that, although I had previously enjoyed a "Looks younger than her age" type status, I had now MORE than caught up. My hair was falling out, I wasn't eating right...I was just a big mess. The next morning as I was leaving work, I heard one of the dayshift girls announce that she would be moving to the south and getting married in a month. I went straight to the director of nursing and told her that I wanted that position, which she granted me. LUCKY ME.

Dayshift was a disaster for me, but I stuck it out for 2 years. I hated my job every single day of those 2 years. Now, this is also acknowledging the fact that I LOVED the people I worked with. Not just liked, LOVED. These were people that were near and dear to me, and we had a LOT of fun together; even on the job! However, I was desperately unhappy. A co-worker and I had an ongoing elaborate plot about how we could make a lot of money doing something else...ANYTHING else...HOOKING or even HOUSEKEEPING for God's sake...just NOT nursing. We would arrive in the morning, get report, then the conspiring would begin. Finally, after two years, a loathesome bitch who worked weekends walked out on the job and they called me at home to tell me about it. I had my request printed up in 5 minutes and drove straight in and put it in the Director's In box so she wouldn't miss it. I have never regretted it a minute since. Never more so than getting a call one Thursday morning (a few weeks after I went to weekends) from the supervisor, "Um, the state is here to do their inspection, can you possibly come in to help us out?" Pure comedic gold, that was....

Weekend Warrior

2006-02-26T16:28:00.000-05:00

(I finished this AFTER the weekend was over)

I am in the middle of a glorious working weekend, and I find that during each one, I hear about or experience MORE reasons why I am SO glad that I work weekends. AND nights. So, for all of you who don't understand the attraction, I thought I'd make a list of what is so great about my working schedule.

1. Reading the blogs of people who work DAYS. It all sounds so...unfortunate! I mean, everyone is running around trying to get to work on time, dealing with traffic, dealing with daycare, (hmm, I'll have to put up a list of why I love having teenaged kids sometimes--I have to remind myself that there ARE benefits every now and again)

2. This sort of continues question 1, but because I am not running the rat race, I find that I rarely ever have road rage (anymore!) and I don't mind waiting. Not at the deli counter, not at the pharmacy, not the motor vehicle dept, not even holding for customer service on the phone. I feel bad for people who apologize for keeping me waiting...they're just trying to keep up like everyone else who works days and stuffs so much into their schedule.

3. This one is both a detraction AND a benefit of working weekends: The kids are home all weekend and I could be immersed in their goings on for the only 48 hours I have off. I think you know where I am going with this. On the flip side, during school vacations, I don't have to receive 98798789 phone calls at work about how this one is being selfish and won't let that one play on his/her gameboy; Instead, I can be right THERE to hear about it. (Wait, am I still listing benefits??)

4. #3 being said, I am still the last one the kids see before they go off to school, and the first one that they see when they come home. I am there to make sure they have a breakfast of some kind and don't go off to school mixing plaids with prints or wearing a skirt that doesn't cover their asscrack. I can usually just run straight in to bring tylenol, meds or a forgotten project. I am there to make sure they are doing their homework and not hanging out in the streets scaring old ladies or making crank phone calls when school lets out.

5. If I have a bad day at work, I know that I will only have to come back, at most, 2 more days to deal with the nonsense, before my 'work week' ends.

6. I get plenty of reading done!

7. Weekend television sucks anyway, so I'm not missing anything

8. Because it is a "hardship" to work nights and every weekend and do 1/3 of the work that everyone else does, I get paid roughly WAY too much more than the daydrones.

9. Monday to ME means Joy. :)

Mom? Is that you?

2006-02-24T13:10:00.000-05:00

I just clicked on this from another site because I didn't see it at the beginning of the year. Whoa. Someone out there really knows ME.

In the year 2006 I resolve to:

Procrastinate more.

Get your resolution here

Sploofus Trivia

2006-02-24T11:05:00.000-05:00

Okay, now I'm going to shamelessly whore for a friend of mine. He runs a really fun trivia site and you should check it out. This is where I am when I am not blogging or reading all of your blogs. There are different memberships, but you can definitely have plenty of fun playing for free. I do get points from this referral, no cash, but I do have an ulterior motive. He just upgraded to a new system and this was a very difficult and expensive upgrade. It is an enormous improvement even over what it was, and I am really hoping for him to do well, since he has just about EVERYTHING depending on it. For those of you looking for a new addiction (you KNOW you ARE!) just click and sign up for free, you will love it!

Play Sploofus Trivia Free

I Don't Give a Crap if it is Solchal or SOWCOW

2006-02-23T22:55:00.000-05:00

I don't watch the Olympics...does this mean there is something wrong with me? My Partner in Crime came to me the other night, "They're showing the ice skating on TV, you want to go see it?" I think that the look I gave her can only be described as, "Incredulous." You know the look...the one eyebrow raised, the other furrowed with the gawp mouthed scrunched nose overbite look? (haha! I see you all trying the look on!) Anyway, point, please? None. I just hate the stupid Olympics. Not just the winter ones, either. My hate is enough for all sports and for all countries represented. I guess that makes me totally un-American? And to that, I say...O.F.W!! I'm tired of hearing about them, tired of reading about them, tired of the programs they pre-empt, which I don't watch, mind you, but I'd like that choice, thank you very much. I'm tired of how often they seem to occur...I thought that it was only every 4 years or something...or was that leap year? I can never seem to recall. Too F-in MUCH, I say.
My mom used to love all the sports, because my dad would watch those, and she'd get a nice nap in while it was on. Now, I get my naps in while everyone watches dumb movies like "Doom." Give me a freakin break. I got about a few minutes in and it was OBVIOUS that it was Resident Evil, but without Milla Jovovich and without the awesome laser slicing scene. It did have The Rock, but I worry...do you think his eyebrows are going to freeze in that furrowed position? Discuss amongst yourselves...

I'm Torn Between Your Highness or Your Majesty...

2006-02-22T17:15:00.000-05:00

When I was about maybe 8 or 9, my mom took my sister and I to New York City. It was amazing. We rode the train in, we went shopping in Manhattan, it was a real fun experience. As we were walking down the sidewalk, I happened to lock eyes with an old woman, which was apparently a REALLY bad thing to do. The woman stopped in her tracks and started screaming at us. My mom grabbed us and just kept walking. I was transfixed and stared behind me at the woman, who kept screaming at our retreating figures. A real KOOK! I had just seen my first crazy person! I was pretty impressed. Little did I know that I was being set up for a lifetime of such encounters. I know I have mentioned here more than once, and will reinforce to you all that I am NOT a social butterfly. I don't go out of my way to meet people in this here real world. But, that's okay! The Higher Power has this all taken care of! Instead, every single fruitcake, crackhead and chatterbox will find their way to my feet, because I am their queen. I really do NOT solicit this, honestly! I have come to know the look of someone who is looking for another person to draw into their web and I will do everything in my power to NOT wind up in their path. It doesn't matter, though. They won't be outfoxed by me walking really fast in another direction, pulling reading materials up over my head or faking a seizure in the middle of the hallway, they will start RIGHT in on whatever they've got in their head that MUST be shared with ME, their Most Serene Liege.
So, I guess you're all thinking..hmm...maybe something like this happened today? Wow. You're good! Yes. I had to take my daughter to an appointment with a therapist this afternoon. While in the waiting room (Where I usually receive my subjects) a woman came in with her older teenage daughter. Right away, their banter was loud and inappropriately personal...the hallmark of your textbook "ENGAGER." I cringed. I was playing a solitaire game on my phone, so I hunkered down and studied it with serious intensity. The woman checked in at the receptionist and sat down with her daughter. They continued the divulging of personal information that I am SURE I had no use for...the fact that a pregnant teenaged aunt already had a name picked out; she planned to have all "Irish" names for her kids, just like her baby daddy. The fact that, "Grandma hates you mom!" "Yeah, I know, why do you think I'm here?" You've got to know that I was about hyperventilating here. I know the signs, man...I know the signs. I could already hear the mother's voice turning expansive as she began addressing more of her comments to the room. The daughter ended one repartee with a shrill "whatE V E R!" and I looked up, surprised. The mother whipped her head toward me and opened her mouth...
...and was cut off by a younger college girl sitting near me, "Oh! I do that all the time...up at Amherst, blah blah blah" She saved my life, that girl. I was so touched. I mean, if she could do this one selfless thing to connect to a total stranger, then surely *I* could warm up to people...start letting ice melt from around my chilly heart...
SHYEAH. Fvck that! My daughter appeared in the doorway and I took off like a gunshot racehorse. The Queen of the Crackheads is too busy to sit around entertaining her subjects all freakin day long.

24 Dreaming...

2006-02-21T12:26:00.000-05:00

Right now, cubes are plotting to hole-punch an important manuscript. My bra is futuristic, and fish-heads that I work with may be clucking.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most fat landlord of my life.

git yer own

Pop..Pop..Popmusic (Yes, I still love 'M')

2006-02-18T15:16:00.000-05:00

I realized that I haven't spoken a WHOLE lot about my musical interests here, like you CARE, but still. My musical taste falls somewhere between eclectic and totally embarrassing. I SO love punk/rap, like Limp Bizkit (but the older stuff, because...DAMN their latest stuff stinks!) and any bands that even delve into that genre like Linkin Park, Sugar Ray, Rage Against the Machine, Korn, etc (White girl rap) On an on-topic aside, did you know that Sugar Ray used to be a hardcore band before they got a record deal and sold out to the man? Believe it. Eh, I'm glad they did. Their music goes down REALLY easy to me. Also on my list is Ska music in almost ANY incarnation; Clash to Madness, Sublime to Bosstones...I love it all. Speaking of which, I have a tendency to love music that I'll never hear again because one or more of the band members are deceased (Think Sublime, Blind Melon, The Ramones..oh yeah, I guess The Clash reunion isn't gonna happen any time soon, either) Also, I will probably be stuck in the 80's for a long LONG time. My tastes back then ran from the bizarre to the inexplicable, Scritti Politti, Kajagugu, The Bangles. So, not SO bad, right? So, the embarrassing is that I am a total FREAK for Johnny Cash (See DEAD GUY reference above) and Willie Nelson. Most country music at BEST, leaves me uncomfortable and at worst, causes me to break down in sobs, because it's all so sad (The hair and chewing tobacco and all) but give me some Johnny and Willie and I'm a happy camper. It doesn't matter what, I'll even take their smarmiest stuff. This predeliction has more than once caused eyebrow raising consternation to my steel-guitar-hating husband. Fortunately for us, except for the C/W idiosyncracy and my secret love for hip-hop, we are probably the most musically compatible couple on the planet. We both LUUUVVVV us some Barry White (Although it doesn't put him in the mood, demmit) and for that matter, nearly all 70's funk, soul and R&B music. We're both nutty about the 80's stuff, although he's not so into the bubblegum stuff that I really used to love. I got him a Sirius Radio setup for Christmas and boy, there just isn't enough preset channels to encompass all of our tastes! So, what is the point? There is none, really, but feel free to share any marital musical issues or your most bizarre cravings (because I'm all about recruiting another quirk!)

Out From Under My Rock

2006-02-16T10:54:00.000-05:00

Because I pay so very little attention to things such as TV and Radio (although I do watch and listen), I wind up missing out on a lot of popular culture references. For example, my husband and kids love to watch all these cartoons on cartoon network that are supposedly semi-adult in content. Although I am home 5 days of the week and nearly ALL of the time that they are watching these shows, I have never even heard of them! Another thing that winds up happening is that I will hear a jingle or a commercial dozens, maybe even HUNDREDS of times before I realize what the commercial is selling. By the time I figure out the product, I could probably sing the jingle, recite the dialogue and say the Phone number, twice for emphasis, of course. So, I have been hearing about (what I thought was) this band named, "Modest Yahoo." I thought it was maybe a...I don't know...play on words...maybe Modest Mouse meets Yahoo Serious? Who knows. Anyway, I was reading an article in some very literary journal (coughPeoplehackhack) when I read the exact name that I had totally jumbled up: "Matisyahu." Boy, was my face red. Anyway, this is a PERSON, not a band. He's a Hasidic Reggae singer (okay, I'm sure you probably all know this already, but in case there are others like me) and he sings a song that I have heard maybe five thousand times on the radio before figuring out who performed it, "King without a Crown." When I figured all of this out, I went to his website, and found a series of links to the video for the song. Reading the lyrics, I realized how intensely spiritual this song is, but I also was just bowled over by how well this guy does Reggae! I also got to thinking that all those haters who ranked on Snow and "Informer" are sure keeping their mouths shut now! I am not ashamed to say that I thought that was an awesome song. Of course, I am also not ashamed to say that I totally (STILL) love Milli Vanilli, and think they got a really raw deal. I wonder what ever happened to the guy who actually did the singing? Whatever. Without the charisma of Rob and Fab, he never would have gotten those songs heard. ANYWAY. Go and check out the videos. There is a live one and a studio one, both very, very good.
-------------------------------------
Something my youngest said to me this morning. "Mom, can you do a google search on making soap with human fat?"

"You. Go get the Fight Club DVD and bring it DOWN from your room RIGHT NOW!"

Monday is the New Friday

2006-02-13T08:56:00.000-05:00

In case you're just joining, I have a weekend job. I work 24, get paid for 36, full benefits, the works. I don't like leaving my family for the weekends, but as I have mentioned previously here, it keeps me away from all of the decent people and off of the streets where God knows what kind of trouble I'd get myself into. So, it all evens out.
EXCEPT for weekends like this past one, where we had a blizzard, and I had to spend 36 hours at work!! (I might mention here that the LAST blizzard we had ALSO fell on a freakin weekend and I wound up bunking up then too) So, I wanted to put a new post up because I sorta feel guilty about leaving that stupid word CLOUD (thank you everyone for pointing that one out LOL) out for all of you to gawk at, and I have a feeling I'm going to be spending the next week showering my skin raw trying to get the work cooties off of me!! Hey to everyone here from Michele's! Now, I'm off to get into my clean, clean, dog&catfur covered bed for sleep that isn't interrupted by a Haitian nursing assistant attempting to get me out of bed for my bowel regimen.

Word Clown

2006-02-08T23:51:00.000-05:00

These are a lot of fun...not exactly original, since I've seen 3 others surfing around today, but I might even get a Tshirt made. I don't know what they mean about a word clown, unless so many words get out of a little car with silly string and seltzer water...

Random Jack Bauer Fact

2006-02-07T19:30:00.000-05:00

Random Jack Bauer Fact

OMFG, is this funny! If you are a Jack fan like I am, go here and just keep hitting the thing. It is a riot. These are some of the facts I loved:

Jack Bauer puts a flaming bag of dogshit on Satan's doorstep every week. Satan knows that it is him, but he can't do anything about it.

Welcome to the Jack Bauer Comedy Club. Rule #1 - laugh only when Jack laughs, which will be never.

Instead of tickling Elmo, Jack Bauer shot him.

One time, at band camp, Jack Bauer killed a guy with a flute.

When Jack Bauer is connected to a series of events that involves foreigners, they have to speak english even in their own homes. They have no choice, that is the way of things.

Jack Bauer once went hunting. Alabama is now mounted on his wall.

After torturing Copernicus, Jack Bauer got him to admit that the solar system revolved not around the sun, but around his gigantic balls.

Jack Bauer would have died for our sins, but Jack doesn't die for pussies.

Nathan Hale said, "I only regret that i have but one life to lose for my country." Fvck that, Jack Bauer is on his third.

Every time Jack Bauer cries, an angel loses its wings. And implodes.

HA HA! Get Out of My Way or I will EAT you!

2006-02-05T17:11:00.000-05:00

This totally makes up for the quiz that picked me as "Chris" instead of "Stewie" in the "Which Family Guy Character are you?"

Results: Which Project Runway 2 Designer Are You? - Quizilla Quizzes
You are Santino:
You're an arrogant overachiever but damn creative!

People want to knock you because you're

overly confident, but when they
see you in action they take notice.
You like to show people how good you are, even if

they don't care. You'll probably be a top

haute couture designer one day.

Which Project Runway 2 Designer Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Actually, I was thinking Jackson Pollock

2006-02-01T02:26:00.000-05:00

Who Should Paint You: Gustav Klimt

Sensual and gorgeous, you would inspire an enchanting portrait..
With just enough classic appeal to be hung in any museum!

What Artist Should Paint Your Portrait?

Everyone's a Critic

2006-01-29T15:38:00.000-05:00

HNT: First Time, Ever!

2006-01-26T20:49:00.000-05:00

Okay, here's something I haven't shared with, well, most of you, but I have a tattoo on my lower back, which I have since found out is termed a "Tramp Stamp" because all the strippers have them. I'm pretty sure I read that on a blog, but I'm hesitant to google search those words...

Anyway, the letters are my Husband's initials (he is a III) which also happen to be MY initials, which also happen to be our Son's initials! So, we are [cubed] get it?

My tramp stamp is/was a gift for my then boyfriend/now husband for Valentine's Day 2 years ago. My friend and I went to a tattoo parlor near her house, and She got her then boyfriend/now husband's last name above some fancy scrolling and flames with roses. Then I stepped up to the bat. Now, I had heard (from TB/NH) that getting a tattoo felt like a mild burning sensation. However, he failed to tell me that it felt like a mild burning sensation on top of the sensation of 283764 knives carving open my flesh. The poor tattoo guy had made 3 outline strokes before I felt like I was going to pass out/puke and he had to stop. I got up and encouraged my friend to traipse right on back to her house and get me some fortified tylenols, which I consumed. (now I know why most people get drunk before getting a tattoo) All I could think of was, I am NOT going home to my honey with 3 black marks carved into my back and the rest of a bunch of smeared marker outlines! So, I bucked up and took it like a man. (and by that, I mean that I had to bend over a couple of stools)

Oh, and I HAVE mentioned that I received a nice copy of adobe photoshop for christmas...I don't want want anyone to think I'm trying to fool them into believing that my skin looks like that. I am wearing a waffle textured shirt and was too impatient to wait for the grid marks to disappear.

It's the Little Things that Mean so Much...

2006-01-25T00:02:00.000-05:00

Blogging was definitely invented so that people could share their most precious moments with about 30 million of their closest friends. This is why I have gathered you all here today. In a woman's lifetime, there can be so many wonderful moments that you never forget...your first crush, your first kiss, the first time you fell in love...your first marriage...the birth of your children...the first time you realized that an old boyfriend's new wife was not as pretty as you. We all had to wait precious precious moments, days and months, sometimes years to achieve these things, and so I am so happy to share with you another crowning life achievement here at 30 Days...

The Day I realized I could tuck my bangs behind my ears. Sistahs, can I get an AMEN?

This is just something that most men cannot appreciate, and I am so glad you were here. Bless you. Now go wash that off of your hands.

And again, I say, WTF????

2006-01-23T19:14:00.000-05:00

In my "hard partying" days (oh, age 20-29, really...) the ex- and I used to rent a really cool house in Va Beach. We used to have parties..oh boy. Sometimes more than 200 people would show at these things! Anyway, most of you probably know the famous "last thing you remember" which usually precedes, or is followed by the tequila shots? I was having one of those moments (but it was shortly after doing a "flaming Dr. Pepper") and if I recall correctly, this was in 1992, and late at night, and the original Howard Stern show came on. I was laying on the couch in a daze watching it, while all the drunk people around me were hooting it up, and I sincerely thought that I must have been hallucinating what was happening on this show! I think they were doing the Butt Bongo Fiesta, or whatever. Anyway, it turns out that I hadn't hallucinated it, this was just a weird show. Since I don't drink anymore, this is a rather distant memory, but one that sticks with me...that sense of "unreality"...that what you are seeing can't possibly be happening...Sort of how I felt when reading Blogography today and reading this post.

To sum up, for those who feel they couldn't possibly surf away from this page, The original host of "Blue's Clues," Steve Burns, quit the show back some years ago and almost dropped off of the face of the earth. There were rumours circulating that he had died of a heroin overdose (not true) But, the truth was even stranger. Steve actually is in a band with some of the members of "The Flaming Lips" and had left to devote more time to his musical career. This Webpage has some pictures, some of his music and some videos. Frankly, Steve's post BC transformation is startling, to say the least. He has the combo short haircut/scruffy face that they give to characters in movies or tv that they want to imply are gay without actually coming out and SAYING that they are gay (not that there is anything wrong with that!) I was disturbed. I loved cleancut BC Steve! So, I was navigating around the site and came upon his music and music videos...not bad! Not bad at all...maybe I like gay-haircut-weird-Steve! He just wants to be someone different! He doesn't want to be typecast forever as the cute, cuddly kidshow host, and I can understand that, right? Yeh...except that following this is a bunch of videos in which Steve stares earnestly at the camera and makes positive touchy-feely statements...sort of like he did in BC...And then there is a weird music video that shows him shopping at the store while messages pop up that say how Steve is just a normal guy who does normal things, but that he used to be the host of the "most popular kids show ever" but is now making a record with the flaming lips...isn't that exciting??? yeh. The whole freak show is capped off with a trip to Steve's webpage to read his FAQ. And it was all going so well before all the weirdness hit. As I said before, I really understand and almost ADMIRE his decision to leave such a lucrative goldmine as that show was for the uncertainty of an unestablished music career...but why throw in all of the references to the show, then? Like I said, hallucinations.

However, I'd still bear his cute, doe-eyed, blue and green striped puppies in a heartbeat.

Betcha didn't know about this!

2006-01-19T18:19:00.000-05:00

Ten Top Trivia Tips about 30 Days of Do!

Dolphins sleep at night just below the surface of 30 Days of Do, and frequently rise to the surface for air!
Abraham Lincoln, who invented 30 Days of Do, was the only US president ever granted a patent.
The condom - originally made from 30 Days of Do - was invented in the early 1500s.
30 Days of Do has only one weakness - the colour yellow.
Fifty-two percent of Americans drink 30 Days of Do.
The colour of 30 Days of Do is no indication of its spiciness, but size usually is!
The first American zoo was built in 1794, and contained only 30 Days of Do!
All swans in England belong to 30 Days of Do!
30 Days of Do has four noses!
California is the biggest exporter of 30 Days of Do in the world.

Desert Architecture, Runway Madness (Spoiler!)

2006-01-18T23:23:00.000-05:00

So, my mom's present arrived yesterday and I was just THRILLED. She had given me a gift certificate to Dick Blick
which pretty much allowed me to go mad with the drooling and the listing and the ORDERING. I got a huge set of the Caran D'ache Neocolor II crayons. These are water soluble wax pastels which work very nicely on fabric. In the picture above, A is on 140 lb watercolor paper and B was painted directly to the Vilene (experimenting) The others were on muslin. These will be for my architecture swap entitled "Desert Architecture" and it is a cross section of a cactus. I found some pictures online of the cross sections and was surprised to see that inside of the thorny cacti was that beautiful sunset pink color...it made me think..hmm...maybe abrasive people are like the cacti...prickly on the outside, but with beautiful centers, if we would all just take the time to get to know them and well, you know, chainsaw a cross section out of them so we could see it. I'm all for it, frankly.
(CAUTION: SPOILERS BELOW!)
Anyway, onto the fun part of our discussion tonight...Project Runway. For the FIRST time in this competition, I found myself thinking that Santino just HAD to go. I really like most of his designs and I think he is spot on in his ability to represent absolute femininity, (enough n's? too many?) But tonight, enough was enough. That skating costume was nearly unbearable. I am surprised that Sasha Cohen didn't literally vomit when the model came out! Not to mention the fact that the model looked as though SHE was about to vomit, just wearing it. Man, she was PISSED. She was about as pissed as I would have been wearing Zulema's Orange "Asscrack Showroom" (clothes off your back challenge) onto the runway. Anyway, as the discussion went on, it was OBVIOUS that it was going to be Emmett that they sliced and not Santino, and although I had been all for Santino going, I was also kind of glad he was staying. Can't help it! His stuff is just so pretty! Can you tell I'm partial to Ruching?

30 Days of Do

The Linenlady's Vintage Linens and Buttons

Robin's Sidewiki

More Reasons to Screw Around all Day

Back?

It's 30 Days of Do, Bitch!

Summer Sprawl

Look what Robin Hath Wrought!

30 Days of Do: Now with 75% LESS Giving a Shit!

Rhetorical Pleasantry Elicits 45-Minute Response

Alterated? Or Ruinated?

With my Usual Punctuality...

Look at the Sign Above our Heads

EH?

Seriously...Seriously?

Case in Point

Bloggable Offense #1

Mist Yew

It's True! Her Hips don't lie!

When Poop Freezes Over

Happy 15th!

Look! Free Caulk!

Make Like a Tree and BARK! No..That's not it...

This is why I Never get any Fire Sauce at the Drive-through!

Thief in the Night

Just Another Manic...Wednesday?

Mel-odrama

Thanks a Latte

Actual Conversation

Providing Comfort, one Search Term at a Time

Making up for Lost Time

They're on to Me

So Take THAT SUCKAZ

My Hearing is 20-20

Nevermind That I Live Less than a Mile from the Library

Thank You Reverend Spooner!

What a Surprise...

At Length

What do *I* Know?

Sleepless in Massachusetts

A Boy!

A Good Deal

American Idol

If I...could be Queen... of da Fo-r-r-r-r-r-est!

24 Season Finale, WTF? (TIVO crowd: SPOILERS!)

The Lord Responds to Yesterday's Posting

And on the Seventh Day, The Lord Smote 30 Days

House Rules!

Oh World, FEAR Me Now!

Elevator Music Interludes

Late Late Late

Out With the Old...

Next, I'll be Scrapbooking

Aliens Contacted me Through my Dental Fillings

Did I Come to the Wrong Blog?

LOL!!

I am SO Getting Some...

Robin's New Job Description

Meme Tuesday

Truckstop Trixie

Bookworm Thursday

Fenway Frankly my Dear, I don't Give a Damn!

Out on the Shelves Soon!

Weekly Update

A Heartfelt Plea

OMFG!

Angst. It's Not Just for Breakfast Anymore

How cool is THIS?

OMFG! 911 ASPCA ASAP!!!! A.K.A "A Rough Life" Revisited

Meme Tuesday

Waiting to Ex-Halen

New Levels of Horror

But it's a Dry Heat...

Honey Smacks us Some Dinner

I have a dream, Ja!

I Hope the Salt Dissolves their Finger

Wednesday Facts and Figures

Weekend Warrior

Mom? Is that you?

Sploofus Trivia

What do I Know?