Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Thanks a Latte

So, I have quit drinking regular brewed coffee every day. Can you believe it? It was wreaking havoc on my stomach; just pure acid to me. But! Iced Lattes from Double Ds seem to do no harm...so I still have that. I only just tried them a few months back, when I saw that they had "Caramel Lite Lattes" and I tried one iced and it was absolutely DELICIOUS. The only problem I had with them is that the caramel settles on the bottom and is hard to stir into the mix, but that's okay. So, I have been getting them...er...nearly daily--After ALL, they are LITE, which, as we all know, means "Without Calories". Every day, I go to DDs, order a caramel lite iced latte, enjoy, lather, rinse, repeat. Then, This one time (at band camp?) I went to CT to visit Mom and ordered one from the DDs there. I drove away and got back on the highway before taking a sip and nearly vomited spontaneously! It tasted like...battery acid! I suspected it was actually an iced caramel flavored coffee, which is quite different than what I ordered. It was so awful, and now I was on the highway, so I wasn't going back to bitch about it. So, I get back home and continue to order daily as usual. Then, I go to a different DDs across town and get the SAME DISGUSTING drink as the one from CT. So, I drove back through the drivethrough and bitched up a storm!! The girls there listened patiently to my tirade before explaining that the latte that has the syrup in it is actually NOT a lite, but a REGULAR caramel latte, and just because mine had skim milk and splenda in it, did not make it LITE. The LITE latte is actually some sort of caramel FLAVORED mix that they add to the drink instead of the beautiful, life-giving caramel syrup. They said that the people who have been making it might not have been trained properly, but that was what I was supposed to have been getting. GROSS! So, they still exchanged it for me, which was very nice, but I have learned a valuable lesson, which is as follows:

Those wishing to donate to me for this valuable information may contribute to the "National Association for the Caffeine Addicted." (Located at Starbucks.) The life you save might be your own...when you prevent some caffeine deprived tweaker from bringing automatic weapons to work.

2 comments:

Nienke said...

Coffee gives me gutrot too, as does tea without milk. My solution: eat something first. I had to give up my French Vanilla Cappacino's from Tim Hortons. I learned they were like 50 per cent oil. EEEEWWW!

N. Mallory said...

I miss my coffee. :(( My little personal coffee maker my parents gave me is dying of neglect, but sadly I only like strong coffee so I had to give it up. I even tried Soyfee in an effort not to give up my morning coffee. It was a sad desperate thing.

I absolutely can't stand DD's coffee, lattes, iced lattes; they're too weak for me. They taste like water. The Lite version sounds absolutely horrid. You're lucky to be alive. ;)